fic rec: Yule Morning, or, Malvolio's Revenge (Shakespeare fic)

[arcanetrivia]

OMGWTFBBQ Shakespeare fanfic?! (fan-play?)

nixitall, you especially might like this yuletide item: Yule Morning, or, Malvolio's Revenge

Olivia:
Not yet, good Feste. There remains the matter of the gulling you, mine uncle Toby, and my maid Maria inflicted on my steward Malvolio. Good fool, was it right of you to use him so?

Feste:
No, no righter than to use a brace-drill to bore a hole or a trenail to plug it up again. For if we use tools only as they were made for, all the pokers should be in the fire, and how would we mull our spirits? Nay, my lady, if a man's spirit overflow a posset-bowl, let it transcend what it was made for, and therefore let us not use gulls for gulling. Nor fools no more for fooling, so I shall warm a bowl of sack or be off.

Olivia:
Nay, you shall stay and be sober a moment.

Feste:
'Twould be the first moment I ever did stay sober.

I can't even fathom what it must be like to undertake writing something like that. It's just astonishing.

Comments

[nixitall.livejournal.com]

Wow. Just... Wow. That is beyond impressive. Wow...

[elethian.livejournal.com]

I rarely feel like keymashing for anything that isn't the most scorching pr0n or heart-tugging angst. But, but, but! The iambic pentameter! The wit! The period-sounding phrasing! The urge for a high-school reunion just so I could be props manager for this once again (lol)! I only wish I had a brain like Ellen Fremedon must have.