arcanetrivia | (no subject)

When Hermionie comes home for the summer holidays thats when things began to change for the worse in the Granger home. She now has to keep a very painful secrete from her friends.five years pass and she cant take it anymore, and turns to her potions maste

Moral of the story? Use condoms.

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We know what happened in the end for Harry and Co. But what about what happened on the other side?

You mean in the beginning? I think that's been written already.

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Isabell has finally gotten into Hogwarts! Hooray! She makes it her school goal to annoy Severus Snape as much as she can. Humor insured!

*files a humor claim*

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Katie Ravenel posses an ability that causes her to see potentially horrible things. Invited back to teach at Hogwarts, can she lead a normal life? Someone attempts to help her, and she falls for him.....

Katie sees this fic, then, I assume.

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A prophecy has been told. one girl is send on a special mission to save the wizarding world.but will she succeed and decide the faith of all?

Looks like they haven't heard of separation of church and state.

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Hermione has always loved the superhero Batman, but she loves her Batman more then the caped crusader. SS/HG Problem with pairing deal with it and don't read.

The Snark Knight?

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Hermione Grangers' motto is When life throws you apple, transfigure them into pears, so why has it taken her so long to transfigure her life into something controllable. Professor Severus Snape thinks he can help, but the question is, will she let him?

Apples may look controllable, but let me tell you about the Great Staffordshire Apple Rebellion of 1878...

Threaded | Flat

The Snark Knight!

OMFGROFLMAO!

You win at life. I'm slain, ded of teh funneh.

Edited 2008-07-25 01:55 (UTC)

Snark Knight did me in. So did the apple rebellion.

Looks like they haven't heard of separation of church and state.

LULZ!

lmao.. they all crack me up, but your 'Snark Knight' comment killed me!!! It's just crying out for a crack-fic....*whistles*

Thanks for the laugh! And for reminding us all that there really is some magnificently awful fanfiction out there. And sadly, not all of it is written by twelve year olds. There was this guy at Portus (must have been at least 40+) who came to do some late night (adult content) reading from his story 'Harry potter and the Veil of Death,' which he claimed had been 'endorsed' by the almighty JKR. A few excerpts from the reading:

Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger, the best friends of Harry Potter, the Boy- Who- Lived, who had stuck with Harry through all his adventures, blah, blah, blah

Remus Lupin, one of the Marauders who together created the Marauders' Map, a werewolf, the one who had taught them DADA in their third year and who had helped Harry to conjure a Patronus...

I'm paraphrasing here, but YAWN! He was only reading to Harry Potter fans. We couldn't possibly know the characters without the cringe-worthy introductions after reading just SEVEN books! And it only got worse. He even managed to garner himself a hapless volunteer to 'assist' in his reading, and I think he read a total of three chapters from his 'book'. I was wishing for a Crucio after the first, and legged it to go listen to the live Snapecast. Others who politely stayed (to hear other, better authors) were, I think, ready to pull their teeth out with pliers by the end. And there wasn't even smut, to account for the late night reading. Apparently, he had comandeered the reading room earlier that day as well. If that wasn't enough, he handed out self-important cards, adverts for his book, and an LJ friend informed me just yesterday that he's even taken out ads on FF.net to promote his story. What an ass!

*snort's cranberry juice out her nose* The Snark Knight! Cute. :-)

(deleted comment) (Show 1 comment)

Is there no end to the wonders our intrepid Potions Master can perform? If there's a cure for that "very painful secrete," I am sure he can effect it. And once the very painful secrete is vanquished, he can collect the fringe benefits... *cough*

Katie sees this fic, then, I assume.

Five points to Ravenclaw.

Looks like they haven't heard of separation of church and state.

Well, the Wizarding World does seem to be pretty medieval in a lot of ways, so maybe they're still waiting for their Reformation.

Which reminds me, if and when I do get to Azkatraz, I will have to sing my little ditty about Martin Luther. Nothing to do with SS or HP, but it amuses me, anyway. And much less boring than the fanfic you wrote about in another comment.

OMG! LOL! "The Snark Knight" FTW. Thanks for those summaries :)

Snark Knight may be made of win but the Great Staffordshire Apple Rebellion of 1878 comment has me in a fit of giggles.

The great Pear-Apple war that followed a few years later was a great tragedy though.