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Just a random thought about the way I use sarcasm and its double-edged application --
One might think at my response to this something like "Hey, she was just trying to be encouraging; couldn't you have said something nice?"
Then it occurred to me that for me, that was saying something nice. It was affectionate, even; a kind of inside-out, smirky, eyebrow-raised way of saying that I was genuinely amused by the image she conjured as well as its metaphorical meaning. The sarcastic remark unpadded by any "j/k"s or other such things was, effectively, a play-bite.
I do it in all kinds of (non-"weapon") situations, too, from reassuring myself of the camaraderie of an established friendship to approaching someone of new sexual interest. This latter may seem especially odd -- snarking at someone you may want to fool around with? -- but I think it's something of a peacock display (a drab and prickly one, I grant) coupled with testing for the presence of my own peculiar ideas of what is desirable in a mate of any stripe. If they, too, are capable of communicating like this then 1) I'm probably not going to put them off by doing it and 2) I'm more likely to like talking to them as well as just staring at their sweet flesh from across the room.
(Telling this apart from usage actually meant to sting, especially online, may be something else again -- a subtle science and an exact art, to coin a phrase...)
One might think at my response to this something like "Hey, she was just trying to be encouraging; couldn't you have said something nice?"
Then it occurred to me that for me, that was saying something nice. It was affectionate, even; a kind of inside-out, smirky, eyebrow-raised way of saying that I was genuinely amused by the image she conjured as well as its metaphorical meaning. The sarcastic remark unpadded by any "j/k"s or other such things was, effectively, a play-bite.
I do it in all kinds of (non-"weapon") situations, too, from reassuring myself of the camaraderie of an established friendship to approaching someone of new sexual interest. This latter may seem especially odd -- snarking at someone you may want to fool around with? -- but I think it's something of a peacock display (a drab and prickly one, I grant) coupled with testing for the presence of my own peculiar ideas of what is desirable in a mate of any stripe. If they, too, are capable of communicating like this then 1) I'm probably not going to put them off by doing it and 2) I'm more likely to like talking to them as well as just staring at their sweet flesh from across the room.
(Telling this apart from usage actually meant to sting, especially online, may be something else again -- a subtle science and an exact art, to coin a phrase...)
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Date: September 30th, 2009 04:11 am (UTC)From:I look at that comment of yours and think, "Oh, that's just
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Date: September 30th, 2009 04:09 pm (UTC)From:no subject
Date: September 30th, 2009 04:25 pm (UTC)From:Truly, for as long as I can remember, that's been your way. A sharp and witty retort that could be taken as cutting - except that the intent was never to wound. (well, unless they were asking for it, but you know what I mean)
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Date: September 30th, 2009 12:13 pm (UTC)From:And this is something that I've noticed in Snape fandom and it has me totally flummoxed. Snape is sarcastic, vitriolic at times... face it, sometimes he can be a real bastard! The fangirls profess to love him, and accept these qualities as just part of who he is. And yet, they are so quick to take offense where none is intended or to cry over mean things that someone said. It makes me wonder how they would fare one-to-one with Severus. Do they think that he would suddenly turn into a Hufflepuff and start spouting poetry and talking about -gasp!- his FEELINGS?! The very thought of Snape doing this inspires a fit of giggles, which of course makes him glare at me. And don't even get me started on ChibiSnapes!!! It makes me want to bitch slap the artist.
*Exhales heavily* Okay, that's out of my system. All better now.
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Date: September 30th, 2009 04:20 pm (UTC)From:lol. My mother's said things like that, that she knows I must really be sick if I seem to be too fatigued even to be cranky.
It makes me wonder how they would fare one-to-one with Severus. Do they think that he would suddenly turn into a Hufflepuff and start spouting poetry and talking about -gasp!- his FEELINGS?!
Since Feeling is First *cough*
I know what you mean though. It is possible to get him to do both things, but it's very much fits and starts and little snippets considerably struggled for, and he does a lot more with meaningful looks and actions. He feels love and the loyalty of friendship quite keenly when he does feel them, but you have to learn to understand his "code".
And don't even get me started on ChibiSnapes!!! It makes me want to bitch slap the artist.
Heh, well... that's its own artistic style or trope, so I think it's possible to validly draw any character or person that way. It is not the best style for really portraying him so I tend to view chibi as a parody when it comes to Severus, but I have a few saved that I like.
(ha, he just shakes his head...)
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Date: September 30th, 2009 05:22 pm (UTC)From:My main problem with Chibis, I suppose -- besides the fact that they are "cute", is that they have no discernible noses. Severus without a nose? That's just WRONG!
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Date: September 30th, 2009 05:43 pm (UTC)From:INORITE? The anime/manga style in general just isn't very suited to his features.
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Date: September 30th, 2009 11:59 pm (UTC)From:I read that comment you used as an example and scratched my head as it seened totally natural and appropriate--like, is there anything else you could have said? I don't think I could live without sarcasm and quickly lose friends (especially online) who don't GET it.
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Date: October 1st, 2009 12:04 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: October 4th, 2009 07:52 pm (UTC)From:But I'll agree with you that on the Internet, comments are more easily misunderstood and can cut pretty deeply if you let them. When you loose tone of voice, you loose a very important means of understanding them.
I can type "Oi Bitch!" in a smirky way but since my vocal inflection isn't registered, it could be taken quite differently. It's best to keep a thick skin while on the Internet, people say things here that they'd never say in real life.
Yeah . . . I was a Mod for about 2-3 years, so much uneeded wank.