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Disclaimer: Do not take too seriously; I am not necessarily saying the fics in question are bad ones. Sometimes they are horrible, but more often they are merely mediocre, and sometimes quite okay. They just all had something in their summaries that I found goofy, misused, or amusing in some other way.
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snarry! they are having fun ;D there is some lime :D
But is there some coconut?
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Like when you bite into a jalepeno, at first nothing, then a small, scrathing tingling sensation, then after thirty seconds, a fiery raging inferno that eats at your spine. That's what its like when I'm with him: Severus Snape is my jalepeno.
....alll righty then.
(My condolences if you actually recognize this character and get the joke.)
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Scarlet Rosewood's from a very old, rich, and strict pureblood family. Though they are purebloods, none support the dark side. What happens Scarlet falls in love with Severus Snape, a Death Eater? Her parents ban her from seeing him ever seeing him again.
Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn.
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Dose not follow The last book at all. Severus Snapes lives but his mopping around
He was demoted from professor to caretaker? Poor Severus. (And poor Argus!)
so his lover gets him a gift she knows he will love. SS/OC/LM. No real plot here it just poped in my head an ended up here.
That's Catholic dogma for you - poping all over the place.
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Hello,my name is Hermione Granger and I am on the run with a dead man.
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Pairings: Dracoxoc Soon to come: Snapexoc Lupinxoc and many many more!
Are these guys like the Nobodies of Draco, Snape, and Lupin? Is that why they have the x's in their names?
Only one OC in each chapter, each chapter is a lemon with different pairings!
I hope can get compensation for the defects in workmanship.
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... Five days now. Five days I lay under a dark wet ceiling. Under a spell of disbelief.
Under a leaking roof, by the sound of it.
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(On this one I've violated my policy of presenting summaries in their entirety even if I do sometimes break a sentence in the middle, and not editing out anything except "Please read and review!" and the like, but...)
Raynebowe Prodigioso was a normal fifteen year old
You know what, lemme just stop you right there. Don't call us; we'll call you.
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In the Mist of War lives are changed.
That's a funny flavor of air freshener.
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Severus decides to sing while he works. Things get out badly out of control.
Heavens, I'm not surprised, overdoing it like that. You're only supposed to whistle while you work! What were you thinking, find the fun and snap! the job's a game?
This is a male x male. SS/DM/LM You have bee warned.
Yeow! That stings.
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When Harry Potter disappears from the Wizarding World, the Potions Master who hides a heart and the shy, bookworm, closet musician with a secret must combine uncomfortable forces to find the Boy Who Lived...
"Shape of... having to go over to your grandmother's weird-smelling flat for dinner!"
"Form of... giving a speech and getting an inappropriate erection!"
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Hermione has come to be the new Potions Mistress at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry! When she sees Severus her long hidden feelings for the Former Potions master araise again! Will she be able to control them!
Will I be able to stomach a fic apparently narrated by Billy Mays and/or the ShamWow! guy!
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Draco Malfoy learns the finer points of game theory. A comedic interlude in the Slytherin common room, starring Pansy Parkinson, Theodore Nott and several thousand kilowatts of heartbreak!
Nothing wrong with this one; I just wanted to say that "Several Thousand Kilowatts of Heartbreak" totally sounds like a title for an epic rock album.
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snarry! they are having fun ;D there is some lime :D
But is there some coconut?
-----
Like when you bite into a jalepeno, at first nothing, then a small, scrathing tingling sensation, then after thirty seconds, a fiery raging inferno that eats at your spine. That's what its like when I'm with him: Severus Snape is my jalepeno.
....alll righty then.
(My condolences if you actually recognize this character and get the joke.)
-----
Scarlet Rosewood's from a very old, rich, and strict pureblood family. Though they are purebloods, none support the dark side. What happens Scarlet falls in love with Severus Snape, a Death Eater? Her parents ban her from seeing him ever seeing him again.
Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn.
-----
Dose not follow The last book at all. Severus Snapes lives but his mopping around
He was demoted from professor to caretaker? Poor Severus. (And poor Argus!)
so his lover gets him a gift she knows he will love. SS/OC/LM. No real plot here it just poped in my head an ended up here.
That's Catholic dogma for you - poping all over the place.
-----
Hello,my name is Hermione Granger and I am on the run with a dead man.
-----
Pairings: Dracoxoc Soon to come: Snapexoc Lupinxoc and many many more!
Are these guys like the Nobodies of Draco, Snape, and Lupin? Is that why they have the x's in their names?
Only one OC in each chapter, each chapter is a lemon with different pairings!
I hope can get compensation for the defects in workmanship.
-----
... Five days now. Five days I lay under a dark wet ceiling. Under a spell of disbelief.
Under a leaking roof, by the sound of it.
-----
(On this one I've violated my policy of presenting summaries in their entirety even if I do sometimes break a sentence in the middle, and not editing out anything except "Please read and review!" and the like, but...)
Raynebowe Prodigioso was a normal fifteen year old
You know what, lemme just stop you right there. Don't call us; we'll call you.
-----
In the Mist of War lives are changed.
That's a funny flavor of air freshener.
-----
Severus decides to sing while he works. Things get out badly out of control.
Heavens, I'm not surprised, overdoing it like that. You're only supposed to whistle while you work! What were you thinking, find the fun and snap! the job's a game?
This is a male x male. SS/DM/LM You have bee warned.
Yeow! That stings.
-----
When Harry Potter disappears from the Wizarding World, the Potions Master who hides a heart and the shy, bookworm, closet musician with a secret must combine uncomfortable forces to find the Boy Who Lived...
"Shape of... having to go over to your grandmother's weird-smelling flat for dinner!"
"Form of... giving a speech and getting an inappropriate erection!"
-----
Hermione has come to be the new Potions Mistress at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry! When she sees Severus her long hidden feelings for the Former Potions master araise again! Will she be able to control them!
Will I be able to stomach a fic apparently narrated by Billy Mays and/or the ShamWow! guy!
-----
Draco Malfoy learns the finer points of game theory. A comedic interlude in the Slytherin common room, starring Pansy Parkinson, Theodore Nott and several thousand kilowatts of heartbreak!
Nothing wrong with this one; I just wanted to say that "Several Thousand Kilowatts of Heartbreak" totally sounds like a title for an epic rock album.
no subject
Date: December 7th, 2010 08:50 am (UTC)From:Dear Gods. There are tears in my eyes. XD I don't even know where to begin. . .
No, this is fantastic.
no subject
Date: December 7th, 2010 09:37 am (UTC)From:With a name like "Raynebowe Prodigioso" I thought it surely had to be a parody, and was puzzled - your satire radar is usually great! - so clicked. But noooooo. Oh, gawds. The author has exactly two fics up, and the other is a Twilight Sue. I... I think my satire radar just broke and I will be entirely more credulous in future.
...Some rather sly reviewer has left a comment to the HP story with "Raynebowe Prodigioso! What a marvelously ridiculous name! I love it. It has definitely won a place on my list of absurd OC names, which takes some doing. Personally I find silly names one of the great joys of fanfiction, but only the best go onto my list. Mere Krystals and Rivers don't make it. Congrats!"
*dies*
no subject
Date: December 7th, 2010 05:49 pm (UTC)From:Not so much radar as the fact that I do look over each fic before including it in my draft post. 's why the disclaimer says "usually they're just mediocre, and sometimes fine". But yeah, as you imply, I do usually pass on intended humor/parodies, although sometimes they make it in (especially if "parody" turns into "epic trolling").
Mere Krystals and Rivers don't make it.
I'm surprised they don't mention Serenities and the like - the parts of HP fanfic I read tend to be awash in them because for some reason it's sooo obvious that Severus would name the daughter he got from that affair with Lily, no, no, the other one, that he never knew existed until just now, with an alliterative S name.
no subject
Date: December 7th, 2010 01:02 pm (UTC)From:That's a funny flavor of air freshener."
*Sprays Mist of War in the bathroom* Ah... I love the smell of napalm in the morning!
"Severus decides to sing while he works. Things get out badly out of control."
I'd say that it REALLY started to go downhill when he grabbed the stirring rod and started using it as a microphone...
no subject
Date: December 7th, 2010 05:50 pm (UTC)From:Sunnyvale... I can't believe I'm still in Sunnyvale.
I REALLY Needed Some Silly
Date: December 8th, 2010 02:56 am (UTC)From:no subject
Date: December 9th, 2010 08:36 am (UTC)From: