>VERBOSE

I borrowed the new PoA audiobook we got in at work, thinking it might be a bit of a laugh. I wondered how much Jim Dale would tend to voice acting rather than straight reading. I took a guess at what would be a good bit and popped in the ninth disc, which happily turned out to start with "The Servant of Lord Voldemort" (Snape shows up in the Shack, argues with Lupin, threatens Sirius, Trio simultaneously Disarm him, eventually Lupin and Sirius force Peter to transform back, etc.). "Glee! This should be good."

It was appalling.

Harry was okay. Lupin was slightly disappointing. Hermione was silly, but then this is a middle-aged man reading a fourteen-year-old girl's lines. Sirius was eyebrow-raising, rather weird actually; I guess maybe he's trying to get that "this man has hardly spoken during his twelve years in prison" thing, but I'm not sure it worked. And Snape-- well.

I know we can't all be Alan Rickman, or Snapecast's Chris for that matter. But honestly, even I do a better Snape voice (she says, dropping pitch, drawing words out more slowly, and seasoning to taste with contempt).

That? That was -- that was Gargamel.

I only got to "GET OUT OF THE WAY, POTTER!" (about three pages in) before I just couldn't take any more. I was embarrassed just to be listening to it. He would have done much better just to read it all straight.

Is the Stephen Fry version any better, or should I not bother my squishy little head about it? (Then again, I might never be able to get over the idea that I was having Harry Potter read aloud to me by the Guide.)

I'm very disappointed with the extras disc for OotP. The deleted scenes aren't worth the laser pits they're encoded in. "Hidden Secrets of Harry Potter" is a totally misleading title; it just talks about how some things in the first five movies will be related to the end of the series (GEE YA THINK?). "Trailing Tonks" is an extremely irritating device for behind-the-scenes after about the first ten minutes, and you get no real depth into any of the departments she visits anyway. "The Magic of Editing" is similarly shallow and the "mix your own" is worth about two minutes' amusement.

I didn't try the "get a digital copy of the film" -- I guess they mean something playable on an iPod or like that. I don't have such a device so I don't know if that is worth the extra money for the special edition.

Unless there is some brilliant Easter egg I am missing, which might be the case, I'd say skip it unless you are a rabid completist, which if you are, you've probably bought the five-film set instead.

I said to nehalenia in a comment:

*pounds desk* I don't understand why they couldn't have done these like the extended editions of LotR. Cover all the aspects of set design, sound design, costuming, propmaking, visual effects, and editing in detail. Talk about how transferring hundreds of pages of book to the screen is a difficult task, and why you made the changes you did. Show us a sketch gallery of storyboards and production drawings. Show us a gallery of the production stills and maybe those character promos making the rounds on the net. Give us deleted scenes worth our goddamn time!

It's not as sweeping as LotR, true, so maybe four-disc sets for each film wouldn't be in order, but really. They could have done so much more. I can't fathom that they don't know how deep the pockets of adult fans are; they could have charged $50 apiece and we'd have lapped it up, if there was enough stuff there. Unless they're holding out on longer editions perhaps to be sold once they've released all seven ... I dunno what to say.

I'm listening to the very first Snapecast now, so the very first time they discuss a canon chapter is, of course, "The Potions Master" from PS/SS. They just had to bring up one of my pet peeves (ohgod just imagine having several pet Peeveses. You'd go insane), didn't they? ( rant on that damn 'stopper death' thing )

ETA: Oh good. In Owlpost in episode 2, they address this and admit error. Still, it annoys me to see it so widespread in fandom.

I just totally went on a Ravenclaw rant in my head. Whoa. Not to post in comm since this is in reply to a post 2 years old now, and that seems to be frowned upon, but yeah. ( Read more... )

sindie (who writes the excellent Severus/Lily post-DH, second-chance AU fic "The Moment it Began") posted about how someone left a really ignorant, immature comment on a Snape fic she read. My response was so long I had to hack it in half in the comments, but I think I'd also like to have it here for safe-keeping. I almost want to post on prof_snape or snapedom, but I think it leans too close to "trying to stir up drama" (since it is not generic, but aimed at a specific person, behind their back no less), and really the subject of "James vs. Severus" has been done a lot in the past couple months. Anyway, stuff in italics is quotes from the review in question. ( rant ahoy! )

"to those whos standards are way higher tough crap live with it! or dont bother reading it!"

Well, screw you. I actually had some concrit, part of which was a polite suggestion that it needs more editing. Very polite, in fact; the rest of the text is approximately as the example from the A/N above, so I think "I think it needs more polishing" is an excruciatingly tactful way to phrase "Have you ever passed an English class in your life? And, if so, how would you suggest I go about punishing your teachers for giving you passing marks?"

The idea had good humorous potential (Snape/Harry bodyswap due to a Potions accident). You'd even succeeded in describing a couple witty images that reminded me of the "Seven Potters" scene in DH (e.g.: Snape finding it odd to smack "himself" in the face to stop Harry shouting; Harry thinking a sneer actually looked rather cool on his own face), which I mentioned in the review I was constructing. Although I was bothered by one highly OOC moment (Snape has no frame of reference for thinking anything is "like the twilight zone", sorry; I might believe this of Harry because of all the television Dudley watches, but definitely not Snape), and slightly annoyed by the awkward (as opposed to clever or still-seems-somehow-apropos) way in which Snape was a little OOC in general, overall it could have shaped up into something decent.

But since there weren't any negative reviews when I looked at them, this comment gives me the notion that you have deleted them. If you are just experimenting and/or are nervous that it is not good enough and would like to hear only encouragement, why not just say so, rather than get annoyed after the fact?

So fuck that, then.

(But nitpicking is what Virgos do best, you see. I'm just following the instincts of my species.)

There's a DH spoiler further down in this post, but I figure anyone who cares absolutely must have read it by now, so I'm not cutting this.

I'm going to skip the major WTFs of the extremely bizarre behavior of the Deluminator and the mechanics of wand ownership and the Fidelius Charm, and I've already been over (though elsewhere) how Splinching oneself during Apparation has been turned from something rather comical-sounding into a source of potentially life-threatening injury.

First I'm going to pick on two things I haven't seen anyone else poke at yet:

1. The sound effect of Apparation. It's always been described as making a very loug cracking noise. Uncle Vernon mistakes/passes off the sound of Mundungus Disapparating as a car backfiring, which is very loud indeed. But in Deathly Hallows, suddenly people are doing it with quiet "pop"s. Buh?

2. This business about Snitches' "flesh memories". Kind of a cool idea in and of itself, and I'm willing to buy an enchantment like this for actual professional play, but doesn't that mean you go through a ton of Snitches? I suppose you could Vanish them so there isn't a landfill problem, but you have to make them out of something in the first place. Snitchmakers must have quite a racket there. Are there such things as "practice Snitches" which don't work this way? And I'm dead sure Oliver, if not Harry, touches the Snitch when Oliver is explaining how to play Quidditch back in the first book. All in all, this seems to be another item from Jo's bulk pack of Oh, How Very Convenient Things.

One which has been:

Polyjuice potion now gives you the person's voice. edit 11/12/07: This always was. Film contamination, go to hell and die in a fire!

One inconsistency which I think is an improvement:

Coming up with the name "Deluminator" instead of "Put-Outer" (which is still used in OotP). It sounds so much cooler.

On the subject of Snape's death:

OK GUYZ LISSEN UP. I am as in denial about this as the next Snape fan and I am perfectly willing to listen to ideas about antivenin, phoenix tears, bezoars and all the rest. But quit trotting out that "put a stopper in death" (movie) or "stopper death" (book) line. UR READIN IT RONG. "Put a stopper in death" just means brewing deadly poisons. It's a poetic image like "bottling fame", which, sadly, does not mean trapping Gilderoy Lockhart in a glass jar until he suffocates. You put a stopper in a bottle. It has nothing to do with having an ace up your sleeve against death.

Kids' names:

What's wrong with the name "Scorpius"? I don't see what's to dis on there. I kinda like it, actually. It follows on Draco's own name as well as all the star names of his Black relatives, and it's certainly no weirder than names like Severus, Rubeus, Aberforth or Bartemius! I get the idea that wizarding children generally do not go to Muggle schools (especially Malfoy children! horrors!), so it's not like this kid is going to be picked on by the "normals".


And now a random throw-in from Goblet of Fire:

That cup must be the only Portkey in the world which is not only reversible, but which doesn't operate on a set schedule.