arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (Default)
This line has to go because it doesn't fit with the different tone I am trying to take in this fic I am frantically revising, but I thought y'all might enjoy it as an "extra":

...undoing the various fastenings of his clothing in a threatening sort of way. (This was a rather tricky thing to achieve, but Severus Snape had a lot of practice turning everyday actions into threats.)
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (Default)
for [livejournal.com profile] coyotegoth from this prompt, Five reasons (apart from the obvious) that Albus Dumbledore and Rubeus Hagrid will never travel on vacation together again.

Warning: contains very bad attempt at writing Hagrid's accent.

1. Rubeus's bathroom habits. I advise you not to inquire further.

2. Professor Dumbledore's, er, washin' 'abits. Yeh don' wan' ter know.

3. Whilst I applaud Hagrid's enthusiasm, in retrospect the safari was a mistake.

4. Sometimes I think the Professor doesn' want me to expand me understandin' of me own subject. How am I supposed to teach anythin' without, yeh know, live examples? 'E wouldn'-a hurt no one, tha' friendly little bugger.

5. Can't risk a repeat of The Racquetball Court Incident.
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (Default)
for [livejournal.com profile] coyotegoth from this prompt, Five reasons (apart from the obvious) that Albus Dumbledore and Rubeus Hagrid will never travel on vacation together again.

Warning: contains very bad attempt at writing Hagrid's accent.

1. Rubeus's bathroom habits. I advise you not to inquire further.

2. Professor Dumbledore's, er, washin' 'abits. Yeh don' wan' ter know.

3. Whilst I applaud Hagrid's enthusiasm, in retrospect the safari was a mistake.

4. Sometimes I think the Professor doesn' want me to expand me understandin' of me own subject. How am I supposed to teach anythin' without, yeh know, live examples? 'E wouldn'-a hurt no one, tha' friendly little bugger.

5. Can't risk a repeat of The Racquetball Court Incident.
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (humour (severus smirk))
Disclaimer: Do not take too seriously. I am not necessarily saying the fics in question are bad ones, but they had something in their summaries that I found goofy, misused, or amusing in some other way. Sometimes the fics are horrible, but most frequently they're simply mediocre, and occasionally there's a perfectly good one that just had a funny slip-up in the summary.

-----

RWSS slash. One shot. Severus Snape brings home a different man every night, yet on Christmas Day he receives a truly unexpected gift.

"What is this atrocity? Please tell me it's merely that Father Christmas has gone insane, and that there is not actually a living human being out there who has seen fit to send me this."

Ron looked up at the thing Severus was holding, sighed, and shook his head. "Oh, that. Weasley jumper. S'pose it was only a matter of time, really, us shagging like this and all. Mum's got to be up to about three dozen every year by now. Frankly, I think she's starting to go a bit mental."

-----

Harry finds out whom is real sire is and Severus isn't too happy with Remus. Ronald Bashing! Rated just in case and for language and violence. Father Son fic/ not romantic!

By this point, one of Snape's eyes was quivering and throbbing and bulging out of his skull as though it were about to literally explode. Harry thought it must be rather painful, but Snape, seemingly oblivious, plunged ahead with his tirade:

"REMUS FUCKING LUPIN, YOU FILTHY FURRY BASTARD! YOU DID WHAT WITH LILY?!"

...splortch.

(Fortunately, Ronald Bashing was a dab hand with ocular healing spells.)

-----

ExpandRead more... )
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (humour (severus smirk))
Disclaimer: Do not take too seriously. I am not necessarily saying the fics in question are bad ones, but they had something in their summaries that I found goofy, misused, or amusing in some other way. Sometimes the fics are horrible, but most frequently they're simply mediocre, and occasionally there's a perfectly good one that just had a funny slip-up in the summary.

-----

RWSS slash. One shot. Severus Snape brings home a different man every night, yet on Christmas Day he receives a truly unexpected gift.

"What is this atrocity? Please tell me it's merely that Father Christmas has gone insane, and that there is not actually a living human being out there who has seen fit to send me this."

Ron looked up at the thing Severus was holding, sighed, and shook his head. "Oh, that. Weasley jumper. S'pose it was only a matter of time, really, us shagging like this and all. Mum's got to be up to about three dozen every year by now. Frankly, I think she's starting to go a bit mental."

-----

Harry finds out whom is real sire is and Severus isn't too happy with Remus. Ronald Bashing! Rated just in case and for language and violence. Father Son fic/ not romantic!

By this point, one of Snape's eyes was quivering and throbbing and bulging out of his skull as though it were about to literally explode. Harry thought it must be rather painful, but Snape, seemingly oblivious, plunged ahead with his tirade:

"REMUS FUCKING LUPIN, YOU FILTHY FURRY BASTARD! YOU DID WHAT WITH LILY?!"

...splortch.

(Fortunately, Ronald Bashing was a dab hand with ocular healing spells.)

-----

ExpandRead more... )
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (general (hogwarts))
Utterly random tiny fragment of Harry/Draco (if you squint a little). I wanted Severus to make an appearance but he refused. Warning for alcohol and silliness. Long note is longer note than fic.

ExpandRead more... )

My brain hurts. I wish I could write. I have 3000 words of pointless smut sitting on my hard drive but I can't turn it into Severus/any-canon-character so there it sits.
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (general (hogwarts))
Utterly random tiny fragment of Harry/Draco (if you squint a little). I wanted Severus to make an appearance but he refused. Warning for alcohol and silliness. Long note is longer note than fic.

ExpandRead more... )

My brain hurts. I wish I could write. I have 3000 words of pointless smut sitting on my hard drive but I can't turn it into Severus/any-canon-character so there it sits.
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (severus humour (be in book))
Note: Not all of these are attached to bad fics. Most frequently the stories are simply mediocre. Sometimes I actually run across pretty decent ones that just have unfortunate summaries.

-----

This story is intended to follow the canonical events of the Harry Potter series, but takes creative license as it explores the relationship between Draco Malfoy and Severus Snape. It may seem OOC to those who don't agree with the author's portrayal.

Soo... if it's out of character to those who don't agree with JKR... does that mean it's in character? *scratches head*

-----

Athena and her friends visit an unusual shop where the owner takes them back to before Fudge caused her parents to go through some horrible acts.

Tsk. A chocolate high can be a terrible thing. (Also known in the United States as "the Twinkie defense".)

Includes a lot of Fudge bashing.

*snickers* *is twelve*

-----

Just days after Severus Snape wakes in the hospital, he gets a little unexpected Southern Comfort. Katie is hardly the usual Mary Sue found in fan fiction. Please read my bit of fluff and see for yourself. If you do not like Mary Sue, DO NOT READ THIS

"Medicine", aha, I see. Wink, wink. But somehow I never saw Severus as the type for sweet, fruity drinks...

-----

Severus left Harry a long time ago. Harry has taken to writing poems to the address that Severus is supposedly staying at even though they are and sent back unopened. This is poem number 5067.

After 5066 owls, those Muggles are getting pretty goddamn annoyed, let me tell you -- but nowhere near as annoyed as they'd be if they'd actually read Harry's poetry.

-----

Laila had a perfect life with her mom in Utah. She was an amazing dancer and when she's told she has to live with her dad and go to Hogwarts will it be a diaster or turning point in her life?

I doubt it's going to be a "diaster". I certainly wouldn't give this two stars.

-----

Was Snape good? Or was he evil? Lexyismyhero and a friend debate on the subject. Please read, and review.

Um, sweetie, that's a very nice "Trust Snape" sticker you have there, but you might want to turn to the next page in the script now. You know, the one with "Deathly Hallows" at the top. No, no, don't worry; we'll all wait while you read it.

-----

A letter from a normally cold man to the woman he loves.

Dear Hermione,

Northern Canada, Iceland, and Siberia have all been very well, but I think it's time for something tropical. Meet me in Thailand next Thursday.

--Severus

Rated M just in case for possible additions

Bets taken here: home-improvement porn or arithmetic porn?

-----

Harry becomes ill and faints in Snape's classroom. What will happen when Madame Pomfrey leaves for the weekend?

Did you get chocolate or vanilla pudding with your lunch? Some of Shakespeare's plays are tragedies. There is a mouse underneath the couch. Is it hot outside? My aunt Laura lives in France.

-----

Harry is sent to an Alternate Universe where noone knows who he is. After an attack on Hogsmeade the Ministry and Order think he's a dangerous, new Death Eater - Voldemort knows better and plans to find out who this scrawny kid is! What's a boy to do?

"Ah, Harry, you've arrived!"

Harry whirled about and levelled his wand at the source of the voice. "Who are you and why do you know my name?"

"Oh, I'm so sorry. Doctor Noonien Soong; how do you do?"

"Noo-- Noone-- wha?"

"I'd prefer Dr. Soong, but then -- heh, heh -- I suppose you're not the type to be calmed by an excess of authority. Now am I right or am I right on that one?"
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (severus humour (be in book))
Note: Not all of these are attached to bad fics. Most frequently the stories are simply mediocre. Sometimes I actually run across pretty decent ones that just have unfortunate summaries.

-----

This story is intended to follow the canonical events of the Harry Potter series, but takes creative license as it explores the relationship between Draco Malfoy and Severus Snape. It may seem OOC to those who don't agree with the author's portrayal.

Soo... if it's out of character to those who don't agree with JKR... does that mean it's in character? *scratches head*

-----

Athena and her friends visit an unusual shop where the owner takes them back to before Fudge caused her parents to go through some horrible acts.

Tsk. A chocolate high can be a terrible thing. (Also known in the United States as "the Twinkie defense".)

Includes a lot of Fudge bashing.

*snickers* *is twelve*

-----

Just days after Severus Snape wakes in the hospital, he gets a little unexpected Southern Comfort. Katie is hardly the usual Mary Sue found in fan fiction. Please read my bit of fluff and see for yourself. If you do not like Mary Sue, DO NOT READ THIS

"Medicine", aha, I see. Wink, wink. But somehow I never saw Severus as the type for sweet, fruity drinks...

-----

Severus left Harry a long time ago. Harry has taken to writing poems to the address that Severus is supposedly staying at even though they are and sent back unopened. This is poem number 5067.

After 5066 owls, those Muggles are getting pretty goddamn annoyed, let me tell you -- but nowhere near as annoyed as they'd be if they'd actually read Harry's poetry.

-----

Laila had a perfect life with her mom in Utah. She was an amazing dancer and when she's told she has to live with her dad and go to Hogwarts will it be a diaster or turning point in her life?

I doubt it's going to be a "diaster". I certainly wouldn't give this two stars.

-----

Was Snape good? Or was he evil? Lexyismyhero and a friend debate on the subject. Please read, and review.

Um, sweetie, that's a very nice "Trust Snape" sticker you have there, but you might want to turn to the next page in the script now. You know, the one with "Deathly Hallows" at the top. No, no, don't worry; we'll all wait while you read it.

-----

A letter from a normally cold man to the woman he loves.

Dear Hermione,

Northern Canada, Iceland, and Siberia have all been very well, but I think it's time for something tropical. Meet me in Thailand next Thursday.

--Severus

Rated M just in case for possible additions

Bets taken here: home-improvement porn or arithmetic porn?

-----

Harry becomes ill and faints in Snape's classroom. What will happen when Madame Pomfrey leaves for the weekend?

Did you get chocolate or vanilla pudding with your lunch? Some of Shakespeare's plays are tragedies. There is a mouse underneath the couch. Is it hot outside? My aunt Laura lives in France.

-----

Harry is sent to an Alternate Universe where noone knows who he is. After an attack on Hogsmeade the Ministry and Order think he's a dangerous, new Death Eater - Voldemort knows better and plans to find out who this scrawny kid is! What's a boy to do?

"Ah, Harry, you've arrived!"

Harry whirled about and levelled his wand at the source of the voice. "Who are you and why do you know my name?"

"Oh, I'm so sorry. Doctor Noonien Soong; how do you do?"

"Noo-- Noone-- wha?"

"I'd prefer Dr. Soong, but then -- heh, heh -- I suppose you're not the type to be calmed by an excess of authority. Now am I right or am I right on that one?"
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (severus humour (asshole harry))
(abandon fic! abandon fic!)

Title: (none — for Last Kiss)
Characters: Severus/Lily
Rating: PG
Words: 140
Warnings: None

Why I give up: The first stanza was inspired. The rest are just imitations. Trying to carry on poetry like this very rapidly starts sounding very forced. I would never have got this up to 1000 words (the fest minimum).

ExpandNow kiss me again... )

Title: (none - for Severus helps Draco brew Elixir of Euphoria)
Characters: Severus, Lucius
Rating: G
Words: 79
Warnings: None

Why I give up: I think it's pretty obvious. This is just going nowhere fast.

ExpandI'm going to have to teach this brat... )

Title: It's In the Script (for Beltane Rite NC-17, NWS)
Characters: Severus mostly; Severus/Harry implied; various combinations of Severus/Harry/Draco also kinda implied
Rating: strong PG-13 or soft R
Words: ~840
Summary: The course of true dreaming ne'er did run smooth.
Warnings: None

Why I give up: Normally I have no problem with crack, but this is stupid crack, with a gimmick that only leads to exasperated head-shaking. Totally fails to deliver on smut; I just can't write Severus/Harry, I guess.

ExpandIt's In the Script )
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (severus humour (asshole harry))
(abandon fic! abandon fic!)

Title: (none — for Last Kiss)
Characters: Severus/Lily
Rating: PG
Words: 140
Warnings: None

Why I give up: The first stanza was inspired. The rest are just imitations. Trying to carry on poetry like this very rapidly starts sounding very forced. I would never have got this up to 1000 words (the fest minimum).

ExpandNow kiss me again... )

Title: (none - for Severus helps Draco brew Elixir of Euphoria)
Characters: Severus, Lucius
Rating: G
Words: 79
Warnings: None

Why I give up: I think it's pretty obvious. This is just going nowhere fast.

ExpandI'm going to have to teach this brat... )

Title: It's In the Script (for Beltane Rite NC-17, NWS)
Characters: Severus mostly; Severus/Harry implied; various combinations of Severus/Harry/Draco also kinda implied
Rating: strong PG-13 or soft R
Words: ~840
Summary: The course of true dreaming ne'er did run smooth.
Warnings: None

Why I give up: Normally I have no problem with crack, but this is stupid crack, with a gimmick that only leads to exasperated head-shaking. Totally fails to deliver on smut; I just can't write Severus/Harry, I guess.

ExpandIt's In the Script )
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (badfic (thrustworthy))
In an AU exists a Slytherin Harry and in another a Gryffindor Harry. What happens when the gaps in one person get too large...

I predict.... death.

...and how does fate deal with it? HPSS, HPLV and DMBZHP. Not for ppl w outstanding morals.

Phew! That excuses me from duty, then.

---

After finishing Harry Potter 7, I was so surprised to find the truth about Snape, and was so impressed that I write this fanfic. Any merit, refer it to J.K. Million thanks for her having written the story so good. Please comment.

I think she's got to be up to J.K. Trillion by now.

(I was amused to see Severus described as a "hapless chap" in this one.)

---

Snape finally meets his daughter, just as he decides he loves Harry. But she likes Potter too, enough to..do the dirty deed with him.

But was it done dirt cheap?

(Points for almost naming the daughter Semele, which though alliterative, would at least not have been a &*^!ing Serena. Points immediately lost, however, for taking a left turn and calling her Semilie instead.)

---

(the entire summary)
harry snape get it on.!

"We were going to, if you'd noticed," Harry said, indicating his naked body as he lay spread-eagle on the bed, "but we'd rather do it on our own schedule, thanks." He shook his head and turned to look at Severus. "Some people are so fucking impatient, aren't they?"

"Myself included," Severus said, running his fingertip down the line of Harry's throat.

---

A potion induced comma sends tow unlikely people into a singing moment. *shudders* Song fic AU

If you ever wanted to picture Severus and Hermione playing the parts of Aladdin and Jasmine, here's your opportunity. Hmm... although you know, Severus would make a good Jafar. Also starring: Gilbert Gottfried as the voice of Fawkes. O.o

ExpandBut 'a potion induced comma'? That calls for crack!fic... )

---

(the entire summary)
Severus relies on his one reliable friend.

As opposed to his unreliable friends, you'll note. Plenty of common sense, that bloke...

(another entire summary from the same author)
Severus observes something that Lily had already noticed.

...but apparently a bit slow on the uptake.

(I'm tempted to offer an MST3K line here: Lily: "Oh! What's that?" Severus: "That means I like you!")

---

(fic doesn't look that bad actually)
Harry has forgotten. Features crazy harry.

No thanks; I prefer dirty Harry. (Do I feel lucky?)

---

Its a wonderful life. Snape wishes he had never been born after Lily's death. A one-shot.

His wish is my command. Alakazam! He's now been born over 21 years before Lily's death.

Once again, kids, clause order matters.

(That movie would totally be the Christmas classic in my household. Forget that Jimmy Stewart guy; give me Severus!)

---

Hermione goes on strike from Snape. Post war. Pretty much ignored DH.

We always knew it was going to end in a strike. The man's just been bloody unreasonable at the bargaining table. Gryffindors Local 7163 unite!
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (badfic (thrustworthy))
In an AU exists a Slytherin Harry and in another a Gryffindor Harry. What happens when the gaps in one person get too large...

I predict.... death.

...and how does fate deal with it? HPSS, HPLV and DMBZHP. Not for ppl w outstanding morals.

Phew! That excuses me from duty, then.

---

After finishing Harry Potter 7, I was so surprised to find the truth about Snape, and was so impressed that I write this fanfic. Any merit, refer it to J.K. Million thanks for her having written the story so good. Please comment.

I think she's got to be up to J.K. Trillion by now.

(I was amused to see Severus described as a "hapless chap" in this one.)

---

Snape finally meets his daughter, just as he decides he loves Harry. But she likes Potter too, enough to..do the dirty deed with him.

But was it done dirt cheap?

(Points for almost naming the daughter Semele, which though alliterative, would at least not have been a &*^!ing Serena. Points immediately lost, however, for taking a left turn and calling her Semilie instead.)

---

(the entire summary)
harry snape get it on.!

"We were going to, if you'd noticed," Harry said, indicating his naked body as he lay spread-eagle on the bed, "but we'd rather do it on our own schedule, thanks." He shook his head and turned to look at Severus. "Some people are so fucking impatient, aren't they?"

"Myself included," Severus said, running his fingertip down the line of Harry's throat.

---

A potion induced comma sends tow unlikely people into a singing moment. *shudders* Song fic AU

If you ever wanted to picture Severus and Hermione playing the parts of Aladdin and Jasmine, here's your opportunity. Hmm... although you know, Severus would make a good Jafar. Also starring: Gilbert Gottfried as the voice of Fawkes. O.o

ExpandBut 'a potion induced comma'? That calls for crack!fic... )

---

(the entire summary)
Severus relies on his one reliable friend.

As opposed to his unreliable friends, you'll note. Plenty of common sense, that bloke...

(another entire summary from the same author)
Severus observes something that Lily had already noticed.

...but apparently a bit slow on the uptake.

(I'm tempted to offer an MST3K line here: Lily: "Oh! What's that?" Severus: "That means I like you!")

---

(fic doesn't look that bad actually)
Harry has forgotten. Features crazy harry.

No thanks; I prefer dirty Harry. (Do I feel lucky?)

---

Its a wonderful life. Snape wishes he had never been born after Lily's death. A one-shot.

His wish is my command. Alakazam! He's now been born over 21 years before Lily's death.

Once again, kids, clause order matters.

(That movie would totally be the Christmas classic in my household. Forget that Jimmy Stewart guy; give me Severus!)

---

Hermione goes on strike from Snape. Post war. Pretty much ignored DH.

We always knew it was going to end in a strike. The man's just been bloody unreasonable at the bargaining table. Gryffindors Local 7163 unite!
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (humour (borgin & burkes))
Severus met this naga name Ava in this...pleasure place...yeah im not good summarizing so you have to read and find out..xD

Sooo... this person looked at Snapesnogger's gallery and decided crossover fic based upon it was the way to go?

---

When Harry’s time with the Dursley’s over the summer proves to be harmful for the boy, Who is sent to watch over him for a week...

Just Who? Where are Whatsit and Which?

...Severus Snape is none to happy.

None to happy in ... well... actually, his meter doesn't quite go that high.

This fic actually isn't all that bad, but there is some amusingly wrong phrasing, and the author often doesn't seem to know which spell-checker corrections are actually the right ones. ExpandBut I guess that's what happens at number four, 'Private' Drive. )

ExpandRemus Lupin was freighted beyond the stars. )
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (humour (borgin & burkes))
Severus met this naga name Ava in this...pleasure place...yeah im not good summarizing so you have to read and find out..xD

Sooo... this person looked at Snapesnogger's gallery and decided crossover fic based upon it was the way to go?

---

When Harry’s time with the Dursley’s over the summer proves to be harmful for the boy, Who is sent to watch over him for a week...

Just Who? Where are Whatsit and Which?

...Severus Snape is none to happy.

None to happy in ... well... actually, his meter doesn't quite go that high.

This fic actually isn't all that bad, but there is some amusingly wrong phrasing, and the author often doesn't seem to know which spell-checker corrections are actually the right ones. ExpandBut I guess that's what happens at number four, 'Private' Drive. )

ExpandRemus Lupin was freighted beyond the stars. )
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (humour (born great))
crossdressing!Remus wants Sev to tell him that he thinks Remus is pretty. Sev says he's not. why would he say such a foul thing? okay so it was supposed to be a oneshot but, I decided how 'bout Snape's POV from say... a chapel?

Severus's expression was stuck somewhere between a scowl and openmouthed disbelief. "Lupin, what got into your furry little brain that made you think this was an appropriate way to dress for church?"

"I'm sorry you're disappointed, Severus, but if when you said 'Sunday best' what you actually meant was 'second best', then you should have just asked for what you really wanted. I keep telling you it's all right to do that and I wouldn't be angry with you," Lupin replied. "In any case I laundered this specially. Now come over here and help me do up the zip."

---

Severus Snape needs Money too see his favorite band KISS, where does he go to get some? Chuck E'Cheese Featuring Lucious Malfoy..

In case you didn't catch that, that's Severus Snape getting a job at Chuck E Cheese so as to be able to afford a KISS concert. (Where "Lucious" comes into it, I couldn't tell you.)

...the goggles, they do nothing!
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (humour (born great))
crossdressing!Remus wants Sev to tell him that he thinks Remus is pretty. Sev says he's not. why would he say such a foul thing? okay so it was supposed to be a oneshot but, I decided how 'bout Snape's POV from say... a chapel?

Severus's expression was stuck somewhere between a scowl and openmouthed disbelief. "Lupin, what got into your furry little brain that made you think this was an appropriate way to dress for church?"

"I'm sorry you're disappointed, Severus, but if when you said 'Sunday best' what you actually meant was 'second best', then you should have just asked for what you really wanted. I keep telling you it's all right to do that and I wouldn't be angry with you," Lupin replied. "In any case I laundered this specially. Now come over here and help me do up the zip."

---

Severus Snape needs Money too see his favorite band KISS, where does he go to get some? Chuck E'Cheese Featuring Lucious Malfoy..

In case you didn't catch that, that's Severus Snape getting a job at Chuck E Cheese so as to be able to afford a KISS concert. (Where "Lucious" comes into it, I couldn't tell you.)

...the goggles, they do nothing!
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (humour (borgin & burkes))
In class drama erupts as both Harry Potter and Severus Snape begin to have a miniature sized duel as the students watch in awe.

Wizarding Warhammer setups must be quite a thing to behold.

---

(The entire summary)
Read.



---

Set in Maruder Time! Snape and James are lovers now they need to save the world! Snape is halfveela, and James is half...well, you need to find out!

Ah, so that's where Severus got his blonde... wait, what?

"Maruder Time" sounds like something you could have a special magical clock for, like that one the Weasleys have.

I haven't seen the sixth movie yet, but I hope all the parings become canon!

Your wish has been granted! There are already some scenes of people peeling vegetables.

*ahem* Somehow I don't think anyone has seen the sixth movie yet. So silly of me to suggest it, perhaps, but why not try the sixth book? Although I don't think you're going to find a whole lot of the Severus/James you seek.

---

Starts in the future, Snape married with children

*horrifying vision of Severus married to Peg Bundy* (well, Peg Snape I suppose)

---

Harry seems to have forgotten all he was taught about keeping vigilant luckily Severus steps in once again to say his neck, leading to some surprises for both.

"Here, try again."

"His neck."

"Hmm. Nope. Slower?"

"His ... neck."

"One more time. Maybe more softly."

"His neck."

"Nothing! This is so weird."

"I must admit surprise as well."

"Who knew there was any combination of words that could prevent that voice from making me tent my trousers in three seconds flat?"

"A most peculiar phenomenon indeed."
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (humour (borgin & burkes))
In class drama erupts as both Harry Potter and Severus Snape begin to have a miniature sized duel as the students watch in awe.

Wizarding Warhammer setups must be quite a thing to behold.

---

(The entire summary)
Read.



---

Set in Maruder Time! Snape and James are lovers now they need to save the world! Snape is halfveela, and James is half...well, you need to find out!

Ah, so that's where Severus got his blonde... wait, what?

"Maruder Time" sounds like something you could have a special magical clock for, like that one the Weasleys have.

I haven't seen the sixth movie yet, but I hope all the parings become canon!

Your wish has been granted! There are already some scenes of people peeling vegetables.

*ahem* Somehow I don't think anyone has seen the sixth movie yet. So silly of me to suggest it, perhaps, but why not try the sixth book? Although I don't think you're going to find a whole lot of the Severus/James you seek.

---

Starts in the future, Snape married with children

*horrifying vision of Severus married to Peg Bundy* (well, Peg Snape I suppose)

---

Harry seems to have forgotten all he was taught about keeping vigilant luckily Severus steps in once again to say his neck, leading to some surprises for both.

"Here, try again."

"His neck."

"Hmm. Nope. Slower?"

"His ... neck."

"One more time. Maybe more softly."

"His neck."

"Nothing! This is so weird."

"I must admit surprise as well."

"Who knew there was any combination of words that could prevent that voice from making me tent my trousers in three seconds flat?"

"A most peculiar phenomenon indeed."
arcanetrivia: a light purple swirl on a darker purple background (Default)
Snape turned around in the chair, clearly annoyed at being interrupted, but spoke with a touch of amusement, resting his chin in his hands. "I cannot believe you thought you had the right to enter without knocking. Wizarding manners these days... And as much as I'm sure the fish impersonation you are currently performing is a riot at whatever sort of parties you attend, it is not impressing me. ...Well? Don't just stand there. I'm sure there was something specific you wished to bother me with."


Just a snippet I left in a comment for this pic by sullen-skrewt on DeviantArt (links to xir gallery page):



This was one of those cases where I look at a prompt and just hear the whole thing, almost instantly. I usually find this particular voice fairly easy write in, probably because I have my own stream of sarcasm running in my head almost all the time. (The snark, we loves it, yes, precious.)

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some kind of snark faery

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